What Does 'Surrender' Look Like?

Oxford Languages defines surrender as a noun in the following way:

the action of surrendering to a powerful influence.

I am currently learning the skill of being in a state of "surrender" This means, less complaining about my life experience. This means, more genuine acceptance (if you don't complain out-loud but only complain in your mind, you will still suffer its consequences).  This means more gratitude for the 'small things.' There is a common quote going around that says: 'Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things' (I don't know who created this quote, if you happen to know please tell me so I can give this person the credit they deserve).

I feel ready for the next chapter of my life. I am telling the universe: 'Hey, I'm ready. Let's do this.' However my challenge has been that little voice in my mind trying to rush things. But I gotta ask myself: 'Hey what's the rush bro?' No really, what's the rush? What's the purpose of the rushing? Are you scared that you will be unhappy until the next chapter begins? Where is this fear coming from? Is there a lack of faith? All of these questions are being directed at my inner voice of fear as I write this post. I feel really thankful at this exact moment actually because I am able to see more clearly how this little voice has been causing me so much stress for the past few months. Worrying about this had caused me to lose so much energy, leaving me with little strength left over to deal with my daily tasks. I believe I have 4 podcast episodes that remain unedited, I have recently felt lacking of enough strength and motivation to edit them and post them,

Now it's 2024. Happy new year by the way! This is our year. This is the year that we have been waiting for. This is when we know what we should do, and we DO IT. This is the year when we realize that chasing happiness is a rat race. This is the year when we realize that being happy is FREE (you will realize this when you spend time with sad rich people. I'm not saying that all rich people are sad but the ones that are are stuck in a very dark place). This is the year where our well-being and our own realization of happiness becomes our priority. This is the year we realize that when we are healthy we are then able to be more beneficial to ourselves, our family, our community, our society, our country and ultimately our planet. This is our year guys, I can feel it. Every challenge we have been through has been worth it, and the fruits will begin to show in the near future if they haven't already. 

'Suffering is the mud where the lotus grows' - Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh.

Why did I mention 'surrender' in the title of this post? Because I realized recently that my suffering was coming from an attempt to control things that I had no control over. It seems so obvious in hindsight, but at that moment I was blind to the trap I was in. Earlier I mentioned the next chapter of my life, well I believe the next chapter of my life is the one where I marry my life partner and begin a family. Not because I feel pressure from society or my family to do this, it's actually kind of hard to explain but it just feels right to me. It's not something that I think I should do, it's something that I feel I want to do. Earlier I also mentioned rushing right? Well although I feel ready for this new chapter, I cannot rush meeting (or reconnecting with) my life partner. The more I chase her or try law of attraction techniques to attract her, the more I repel her. So for now, I must commit to MYSELF. I must commit to my own inner work and development. Even though I feel ready to meet her right now, it should be okay if she takes her time to appear because this just allows me to prepare myself even more for her arrival. I will be ready regardless, so by logic there is no need for me to rush.

How will I know when she appears?

That's a good question actually, and I think most people won't like my answer. And of course, my answer is just the best guess that I can produce at the moment. But I believe that when her and I are both ready and we make eye contact, we will both know. There will be an abyss of presence in our eyes that feels like home. That is my best guess at the moment. I will follow my intuition as best as possible. We will not be two incomplete people trying to use each other to feel whole, instead we will be two people ready to share our own happiness with each other. I am still learning to realize my own happiness, so there is no rush in finally meeting (or reconnecting with) this person.

To surrender in this case means to stop trying to control the uncontrollable. My attempt in doing so has caused me enormous suffering in the past few months. I feel ready to let go of the reigns. Let go bro, have faith, be present, this game called 'life' is temporary, it would not be wise to spend your temporary time stressing about things you can't even control. These are things that I am currently telling to my mind.

'The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master' - Robin Sharma

Until next time everyone,

much love!